


The Opposite of Usual

by mysensitiveside



Category: Gossip Girl
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-24
Updated: 2012-03-24
Packaged: 2017-11-02 10:53:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/368201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mysensitiveside/pseuds/mysensitiveside
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Serena defied any statement that began with the word “usually.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

Usually, kissing one’s best friend was a bad idea. Especially when alcohol was involved. And especially when you were both in a room filled with other people. Including, by the way, both of your boyfriends.

Usually, spin-the-bottle was simply a silly little game; any mortifying and/or titillating pairings would be forgotten within an hour or two, once something more exciting came along and everyone’s collective ADD took over.

Usually, a single kiss couldn’t undo Blair in such totality that she found herself literally gasping for breath.

But when it came to Serena... Serena defied any statement that began with the word “usually.”


	2. Things Learned

_Spotted: S and B getting a little more than friendly at Chuck’s birthday bash, while everyone around them drooled (and yes, Lonely Boy and N were there too). It may have been just an innocent game of spin-the-bottle, but they sure could have fooled me. Foursome, anyone?_

When Serena’s mouth tasted like vodka, she liked to kiss Blair’s neck. She could spend half an hour, sometimes more, just focused on that one body part. Blair certainly wasn’t complaining.

When it was more the taste of gin that found Blair’s tongue, Serena would often get a bit more daring, slipping her hand underneath Blair’s blouse. The first three times this happened, Blair calmly pushed Serena’s hand away. By the fourth time, however, she had decided that she kind of liked having Serena’s hand there.

When Serena’s lips were coated with that unique mix of salt, lime, and tequila, she became more talkative. Blair could never keep a shiver of excitement from running through her body whenever Serena whispered huskily in her ear. Sometimes, Blair would even forget to pay attention to what Serena was actually saying. It was enough to simply listen to that velvety voice, something between a purr and a growl, as it flowed around her.

Blair, herself, could control Serena’s actions as well. If she was in the mood for french kissing, all she had to do was drink some of their 1995 vintage Château Margaux. Serena couldn’t resist the temptation of the deep red wine, with its hints of raspberry and oak and blackcurrant, and would spend plenty of time trying to devour Blair’s flavorful lips.

Before Chuck’s party, Blair had thought that she knew almost everything about the striking blonde. After all, in spite of the many fights, they had been best friends since forever. But these were the types of new things that Blair was now learning about Serena.

When Serena’s skin tasted like Dan, though... It was a muskier taste. Hard to describe, but easily identifiable. When Serena tasted like Dan, Blair didn’t hesitate for a moment before kicking the girl out of her room.

* * * * *

The first time that Blair kicked her out, Serena was confused. She didn’t need to be told that it wasn’t normal for two best friends to enjoy making out with each other. But still, Serena hadn’t expected Blair to kick her out. Especially after just one kiss. They’d certainly kissed plenty of times before, at that point. This time, she hadn’t even gotten a chance to really do anything that would warrant getting evicted from Blair’s presence.

Luckily for Serena, she was a quick learner. Because the second time that Blair kicked her out, Serena realized what the problem was. After that, she made a point of never trying to kiss Blair if she’d recently kissed Dan as well. Somehow, the brunette seemed to know.

Serena was glad that there appeared to be no hidden cameras in either her own or Blair’s bedrooms (or in one of the closets -- how fitting, by the way, for two girls to make out in a closet -- in the Bass’ suite). Serena knew that it was only the fact that no one else knew what was going that made it possible for whatever this was to continue. Blair had totally freaked out when Gossip Girl mentioned their spin-the-bottle kiss.

“Well what did you expect, Blair? We kissed in front of at least fifteen people. Did you really think that Gossip Girl wouldn’t find out about it?”

Serena sighed in exasperation. She hadn’t really been worrying about the kiss, even though she readily admitted that it was more intense than she had been expecting. But Blair’s complete mortification about the whole thing was only making her feel worse.

“I don’t know. I guess I didn’t think about it. I mean, I OBVIOUSLY didn’t think about it. Kissing you in public isn’t something that would have happened if I had been thinking about it.”

Serena tried not to feel hurt. She knew that she shouldn’t care what Blair said. If she had been sober that night, then she wouldn’t have kissed Blair either. Right?

“It was just a stupid game, B. No one cares. Sometimes you really need to take that stick out of your ass.”

Blair’s mouth gaped open in shock, as Serena turned on her heel and walked away. She knew that she had no right to be mad at Blair, but she simply couldn’t help it.

But away from any potentially prying eyes...that was an entirely different matter. So one, two, sometimes three nights a week – after a party, or a club, or a date with a boyfriend -- Serena and Blair somehow managed to find themselves alone in a room (or a closet, that one time) together. And they certainly weren’t using this time to sit around and talk. Chatting about all the random things that BFFs chatted about was reserved for situations marked by daylight and sobriety.

Serena didn’t know what they were doing. Not really. She just knew that she enjoyed it, and if she didn’t think about it too much, then she didn’t need to worry about what that might mean.

It was just that, after that kiss...she immediately wanted to do it again. So, the next time that she had Blair to herself and was sufficiently tipsy, Serena couldn’t stop herself from answering the question of what Blair’s lip gloss tasted like. She hadn’t been quite able to figure it out that first time. But now she knew. Serena had always liked the taste of strawberries.

* * * * *

As Blair walked down 

Madison Ave

, she felt a hand come to rest on her shoulder, and in the split second before she turned around to see who it was, her entire body tensed. Because, while odds were good that it was either Nate or Serena, she didn’t know which one it would be, and that left her feeling unprepared.

With the strange state of her relationship with Serena, Blair was no longer sure how to act around either of them -- theboyfriend and the best friend whom she occasionally made out with. She hated not knowing how to act. Still, she had long-ago learned how to control her reactions, so she at least knew that no one would notice the momentary flinch.

“Hello, beautiful.” It was Nate. Once the identity was verified, she simply continued walking, with Nate now keeping pace beside her. “Out enjoying Eleanor’s credit card?”

“Actually, I’m enjoying the result of my father’s latest bout of guilt for no longer living in the same country as me. He likes to send me money every once in a while.”

“Ah, yes. That was my next guess. Anyway, I was going to call you later, but since I’ve found you, I’ll just mention it now. My parents are going to some benefit tomorrow night and are making me go too. I didn’t pay attention to the details, but it’s sure to be boring. So I was wondering if you wanted to come and keep me company.” Nate flashed one of his winning smiles. “Plus, it’ll be an excuse for you to wear one of the new outfits you just bought.”

“Tomorrow night?” Blair frowned. “Sorry, I can’t. I told Serena that I’d go with her to the show with the latest Project Runway designers.”

“Well, cancel. I’m sure she can find someone else to go with her. She’s got Dan wrapped around her little finger. He’d go.”

“But the point is, I said that I’D go. So I’m going.”

“You know, I used to be able to always count on you to come to stuff like this when I needed you. You’d drop anything. But it’s not true anymore. I’m your boyfriend, and I’m asking you to go, and that used to be enough for you. I’ve been trying to be the perfect boyfriend, because everything needs to be perfect with you, but apparently it’s just not working.” Nate was sounding increasingly bitter. “I just don’t understand what’s going on, Blair. What exactly do you want from me?”

Blair stopped in her tracks and whirled around to stare incredulously at Nate. “Are you serious?? Why on earth should I have to drop everything, on short notice, to go with you to this thing, which you’ve only described as likely to be boring? I’m sorry, but my world doesn’t revolve around you, Nate, and you shouldn’t expect it to!”

Blair briefly started to walk again, before stopping again. She hadn’t meant to have this argument right now, but she couldn’t help it, and she wasn’t done yet. Blair had been feeling so stressed lately, and she needed to release some bottled-up energy in a way that didn’t involve kissing and Serena.

“And that’s another thing... Not too long ago, I did everything for you! I was the PERFECT girlfriend. But you were oblivious. You didn’t care. And then, you slept with my best friend!”

Nate ran an agitated hand through his hair. “You can never let that go, can you? I made a mistake, and I’ve acknowledged that. But I’ve moved passed it! You should too.”

Blair released a brief sound that could almost be interpreted as a laugh. “Yeah, like you wouldn’t drop me in a second if Serena would actually have you.”

Nate waited just a little bit too long before replying, “That’s not true, Blair.”

“Yes it is, but whatever.” Blair was livid. “But now that I don’t ask ‘How high?’ whenever you tell me to jump...NOW you suddenly turn into the perfect boyfriend. That’s why you suck, Nate. Because you’re only good to me when you think I might leave you. You don’t want a girlfriend who drops everything to be with you. You think you do, but you don’t. You had one, and you CHEATED on her! So I will never cancel any plans for you ever again. Understand?”

Blair stormed off, leaving a stunned Nate in her wake.

Later, alone in her room, Blair had moved on from anger to sadness. When had her life become such a mess? Who was she kidding? Her life had always been a mess. She reached for her phone, ready to text Serena. She needed someone to help cheer her up.

Before she got the chance, though, Serena was suddenly at her door. For a moment, Blair had the irrational idea that her own thoughts had magically conjured up Serena for her.

“Hi. Eleanor let me in.” Serena could instantly sense the melancholy surrounding Blair. She had seen Nate and Blair arguing in the middle of Manhattan today. It had to be bad, for Blair to actually make such a scene with so many witnesses. Serena knew that Blair always hated it when she wasn’t in complete control over her emotions, especially when there were other people around to see it. “Are you okay?”

Blair scoffed. “What, Dan wasn’t available? Are you here for the latest booty call?” Even though she had wanted to see Serena, Blair couldn’t help but be suspicious of the sudden appearance, given what usually happened lately when they were alone together at night.

Serena cringed. They had never talked about what was going on between them. But now didn’t feel like the right time to start.

“No, Blair, that’s not...” She trailed off, reaching out to grab Blair’s hand and soothingly run her thumb across the flawless skin. “You’re my best friend, and I like being around you. So I came over. And I’ve known you long enough to know when you’re upset, so you don’t have to bother with trying to pretend that nothing ever affects you.”

Blair hesitated, turning to look up at Serena’s sympathetic face, before wrapping her arms tightly around the blonde. Serena quickly followed suit, enveloping Blair in a warm and comforting hug.

“Nate and I had a fight. I hate it when we fight.” Blair slowly calmed down, as she felt her own heartbeat match Serena’s. Serena didn’t say anything, just ran her hand up and down Blair’s back, allowing Blair to continue at her own pace. “Sometimes I wonder why I’m still with him.” Blair paused. “Will you stay over tonight? I don’t want to be alone.”

Serena felt her heart beat faster at Blair’s admission of vulnerability. If Serena had any say in the matter, Blair would never be sad again. “Of course, B,” she whispered gently. She turned to softly kiss the side of Blair’s head, before resting her cheek against the spot where her lips had just been, and squeezing Blair a little tighter.

And for the first time in a while, Blair felt truly comfortable.


	3. Things Unsaid

_Spotted: N and B, our favorite on-again off-again couple, having quite the argument in front of Dolce & Gabbana. Could there be trouble in paradise yet again?_

__Most people thought that Blair was a bitch. Serena knew that, and could even see where the thought came from, but the Blair that she knew was very different from the Blair that everyone else knew.

Most people thought that Blair lived to make others feel bad about themselves. That was true, to a certain extent, but Serena never thought of Blair as a bully. Blair was simply unwilling to take anyone’s crap, and had no respect for anyone who took hers without complaint.

Most people thought that Blair was unaffected by any and all criticism. But Serena saw the tiny flinches and frowns and tensions that revealed a deep-seated desire to fit in. Just like everyone else, Blair simply wanted to be liked. She just had a peculiar way of getting there.

Serena, however, was not most people. Serena was the one who got to see what she thought of as RealBlair. A girl who was witty, and beautiful, and intelligent, and misunderstood. Not even Nate got to see RealBlair all the time.

RealBlair was someone that Serena loved. It was a love that was different from anything she had ever felt before. But of course, Blair didn’t want to hear that Serena loved her. At least, not in the way that Serena felt it. That would be way too serious. Serena could show her love, but she could never express it aloud.

Most people thought that Blair felt no emotion. No emotion other than smugness, that is. But when Serena kissed Blair, she would feel Blair melt against her. And the feeling of Blair’s lips moving against her own... Serena felt like she had more than enough emotion to make up for the two of them.

* * * * *

Serena walked into the room, her eyes immediately searching for a particular brunette. She smiled as she found her, talking to a wide-eyed Jenny Humphrey. Serena sauntered over, calmly wrapping her arm around Blair’s lower back and leaning down to rest her chin on Blair’s shoulder. Blair continued talking as if nothing had happened, rambling to Jenny about the importance of small details, or something like that. Jenny only spared one quick glance towards Serena before her eyes returned to her idol.

Once Jenny left, Serena shifted, turning to face Blair and lightly placing her hands on Blair’s hips. “Aw, how sweet that you’ve taken Little J under your wing. Training her to follow in your evil footsteps, huh? I’m glad you finally decided to be nicer to her.”

Blair simply ignored the comment, a perfectly neutral expression adorning her features. “You really shouldn’t have your hands on me like this, S. Not with so many people around.”

Serena just smirked. Blair took Serena’s hands in her own, but before Blair could remove them from her body, Serena pulled a startled Blair into a warm hug.

She leaned her head down to softly whisper in Blair’s ear. “But that’s the beauty of our friendship, B. We’ve always been touchy-feely with each other, so no one thinks twice about it. In fact, people might start to be suspicious if we didn’t maintain physical contact, not the other way around.”

Serena pulled back from Blair, holding her at arm’s length. She smiled in a way that she hoped was reassuring. “So don’t worry, Blair. Nothing has to be different. Just act like we always do.”

With that, she looped her arm through Blair’s and turned them to face the rest of the room. “Now,” she began, “come take a shot with me, and then we’ll find someone whose fashion sense you can mercilessly pick to shreds.”

Blair turned her head and eyed Serena thoughtfully. “I’ll have wine.” She paused, but turned back to look out straight ahead. “I think you should have a gin martini,” she commented idly, still not looking at Serena, even as a slight blush crept across her cheeks.

Serena looked to Blair with amused curiosity. “Um, okayyy...” she replied, drawing out the last syllable. She had no idea why Blair was now choosing her drinks for her, but it wasn’t really a big deal, she supposed. She did like gin martinis, after all. “Whatever you say, my Queen.”

* * * * *

When Blair felt Serena approach her for a second time that night, Blair was alone. Not physically alone, as there were still a lot of people at the party, but she wasn’t actually talking to any of them this time. She had been talking with Nate, but Blair dismissed him when she became too annoyed with that dumb grin he always wore when he was high. Plus, while she had been talking with Nate, she had also been watching Serena dance with Dan, and the fact that she couldn’t take her eyes off Serena made her irritated.

“Where’d you put your coat, B? I’m whisking you away.”

Blair turned to look at Serena, who was grinning goofily at her. It was all Blair could do not to grin back.

Instead, she merely arched one curious eyebrow. “You’re whisking me away? What does that mean, exactly?”

“It means that this party is boring, so I’m going to rescue you from the monotony.”

Blair crossed her arms in front of her chest. “I can’t just leave, S. It’s Nate’s party. I’m not supposed to leave my own boyfriend’s party.”

“Oh come on,” Serena scoffed. “You’re Blair Waldorf! You can do whatever the hell you want!”

Blair looked to Serena’s eyes and briefly wondered if Serena was still just talking about leaving the party. “What about Dan?” she asked.

Serena sighed and rolled her eyes. “What about him?”

“Does he know that you’re leaving?”

“Not exactly. But he’ll be fine. And since when do you care about Dan Humphrey’s well-being?”

Blair frowned. “I don’t. It’s just that--”

“Look, are you coming or not?” Serena interrupted. “Please come.”

There was no way that Blair could resist that adorable pout. So, after downing the rest of her drink, she smiled. “Fine. Whisk me away.”

Once they were outside, Blair asked, “So, where are you taking me?”

Serena reached down and grabbed hold of Blair’s hand before replying, “Well, I was thinking we’d hop on a flight to Paris, have breakfast beneath the EiffelTower, and then maybe head over to Italy. I hear they have good pizza there.”

Blair laughed. “Sounds great. Unfortunately, I don’t have my passport with me.”

“You don’t??” Serena sighed dramatically. “Well that just ruins the whole thing! I guess I’ll just take you down to the Village instead.”

Of course, in spite of the fact that it was some ungodly hour, Serena had no trouble flagging down a taxi.

“You’re taking me to the Village? Why tease me with Paris if you’re only taking me downtown?”

“Because, at...” Serena paused to look at her watch. “1:30 in the morning, the Village is so much more exciting than the Upper East Side. We’re bound to find something to do.”

“You mean you don’t even have something specific planned? You’re just going to get us lost or raped or both.” Blair was starting to doubt the wisdom of following Serena. Especially a Serena who wasn’t exactly sober.

“Where’s your sense of adventure, B? It’s called being spontaneous! Supposedly, some people even find spontaneity romantic. Ooh, we’re going there! Stop the cab, please. We’re getting out.”

Blair looked around warily, unsure of what had caught Serena’s attention. “Oh no. No way are you taking me to a karaoke bar.”

“Yes! It’ll be so much fun!”

Serena practically dragged Blair into the bar. Blair was glad to at least see that there weren’t many other people there. Blair kept grumbling about the situation, however, until Serena apparently got fed up with her and went to go sing on her own.

But there was something about the sight of Serena rocking out to “Pour Some Sugar On Me” that was amazingly sexy. Once again, Blair couldn’t take her eyes off the blonde. Serena didn’t have the greatest voice, but her stage presence more than made up for it.

When Serena slid back into the booth, next to Blair, Blair simply stared at her. Then, unable to stop herself, she leaned forward and captured Serena’s lips with her own. Serena was obviously taken aback for a moment, but then she quickly recovered and eagerly kissed back, pushing them into the darkest corner of the booth.

Blair could hardly believe herself. Here she was, in the middle of a karaoke bar, kissing Serena, as Serena’s hand wandered gently across her skin. And though it was highly unlikely that anyone they knew would see them, it was certainly possible. But right at that moment, Blair didn’t care. Because Serena’s lips were soft and insistent and gloriously talented. And that’s all that mattered.

* * * * *

It was two in the morning, about a week later, when Serena knocked softly on the door to Blair’s room. She really hoped that Nate wasn’t there.

At Blair’s “Come in,” Serena entered, her eyes raking over Blair’s nightgown-clad form.

“S. What are you doing here?”

Serena didn’t know how to answer that question. What was she really doing there? The answer was way too complicated, so instead of responding verbally, she simply walked over to Blair’s bed and climbed up next to her. Reaching out to stroke Blair’s cheek, she then leaned over and quickly brought her lips to Blair’s.

The moment that Serena pushed her tongue inside Blair’s mouth, however, Blair instantly pushed back against Serena’s chest, separating them. Serena felt panic run through her. What had she done wrong now? After each time that she kissed Blair, she ended up worrying that the next time, Blair would put a stop to the whole thing.

Blair was just looking at her confusedly.

“What? What is it? What’s wrong?” Serena asked.

“Vanilla. You...you taste like vanilla. Did you have vanilla vodka or something?”

This line of questioning was only making Serena more confused. “What? No. I...I haven’t been drinking tonight. I, um, got a new vanilla flavored mouthwash recently.” The thought that Blair could taste her mouthwash was so strange and... _intimate_.

“Oh. So...you’re not drunk?”

“No, I’m not. Is that a problem?” Serena bit down nervously on her bottom lip. Their faces were still close together, and Serena waited as Blair stared back at her with creased brow.

After an endless, breathless minute, Blair finally smiled. “No,” she whispered. “Not at all.” And without another word, Blair reached her hand behind Serena’s head and pulled their lips back together.

Serena moaned softly as she felt them connect, maneuvering herself so that she was half on top of Blair, her arms wrapping around Blair’s body and Blair’s hands remaining entangled in Serena’s hair. Serena thought that there could be no better feeling than this.

All too soon, Blair pushed her away again. “Wait. What about Dan? Weren’t you on a date with Dan tonight?”

Serena sighed in resignation, knowing that she would have to talk about this now, and flopped back down next to Blair, lying on her back and staring intently at the ceiling.

“Yeah. I broke up with him tonight.”

Blair quickly propped herself up on one elbow so she could see Serena’s face. “You did what? Why?”

“I broke up with Dan.” She paused. “Because I’m not in love with him.” Serena hoped that Blair would understand the rest of the sentence, the part that she only said inside her head. Serena wasn’t in love with Dan, but she had a feeling that she was falling in love with someone else.

Blair lay back down on the bed as well. “Wow. You broke up with him. Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Dan wasn’t exactly happy, but if anything, I just feel guilty for not feeling more upset about it.” Serena turned her head to the side, finding Blair already looking at her. Serena continued, “I really want to kiss you right now.”

“Well, you’re Serena van der Woodsen. You always get what you want.”

Figuring that it was as close to an invitation as she was going to get, Serena returned to her position above Blair, stroking her thumb across Blair’s lips before bringing her head down to the rosy mouth below her.

Their kisses started off slowly, but quickly built in passion and energy, until Blair’s hands were tugging at Serena’s shirt. They separated briefly, and in a blur of flying clothes, frantically stripped each other down to skin-on-skin. Serena’s eyes widened at the sight of a naked Blair. In about ten seconds, they had just leaped way beyond the boundaries of what they had done before.

No words were exchanged now. No words were needed. Just caresses and gasps, kisses and soft murmurs of pleasure. And when Serena’s fingers circled around Blair’s nipple, and Blair arched up into Serena’s hand, she thought that maybe it would be a good idea to simply never leave this bed.

Then, as Serena became aware of Blair’s hips starting to rock against her, she realized that she wanted to -- no, needed to -- taste Blair. So, without another moment’s hesitation, she slid her way down Blair’s body, pausing to kiss and lick and suck at various spots along the way.

The taste was intoxicating, as she eagerly explored the wet heat between Blair’s legs. And when Serena felt the heel of Blair’s foot digging into her back, her hands grasping onto Blair’s bucking hips as Blair climaxed around her tongue, Serena felt like she had so many things to say, but no words that were good enough to say them.

So instead, she merely climbed back up Blair’s heaving body, looked into Blair’s half-lidded eyes, and whispered, “Thank you.”

Blair laughed at that. “You’re thanking me? I’m pretty sure that you just did all the work, S. So thank YOU.” Blair then lifted her head and kissed Serena again, wrapping her arms around Serena’s neck.

Serena vaguely noticed when one of Blair’s arms moved, but didn’t really think about it until she felt two fingers slip inside her. She gasped, moaning out Blair’s name, before kissing down even harder.

Soon, though, Serena was too distracted by the feelings coursing through her to do anything other than move her hips in rhythm with Blair’s fingers and breathe heavily against Blair’s skin. Blair’s mouth clamped down on Serena’s shoulder, her teeth nipping at the smooth skin, but Serena barely felt it. She shattered, overwhelmed by sensation, and turned into a quivering heap on top of Blair.

Exhaustion overtook them both, and as Serena sleepily spooned up against Blair’s back, wrapping her arm around Blair’s waist and feeling Blair grab hold of her hand, Serena knew that Blair would be her drug of choice now, not alcohol.

And right before they drifted off to sleep Serena heard a soft whisper of, “I love you, Serena.”

Serena smiled widely, tenderly kissing the back of Blair’s shoulder. “I love you too.”

And for the first time in a while, Serena fell asleep clear-headed and unafraid of what the next day would bring.


	4. Epilogue

_What is the world coming to? First S and Lonely Boy break up, and now, rumor has it that B and N may have actually called it quits for good. So, any guesses as to which lucky guys Manhattan’s most eligible teen bachelorettes will set their sights on next?_

__

Usually, kissing didn’t mean a whole lot to Serena. She had kissed plenty of people, both under and over the influence, and it simply wasn’t a big deal. It was all just for fun, really. Simply a nice way to pass the time.

Usually, a guy like Dan would be enough to change Serena’s mind about kissing. Because Dan was sweet and cute and considerate and all those other good things that should have made Dan perfect.

Usually, kissing one’s best friend was a bad idea. But most people weren’t best friends with Blair Waldorf. And when one’s best friend turned into one’s girlfriend... Well, it certainly wasn’t “usual,” but Serena no longer felt any desire to kiss anyone else.

Life was so much more interesting when you ignored any statements that began with the word “usually.”


End file.
